Mocktail Minutes

"I Started My First Diet at 8 Years Old"...with Erin Darling

Mocktail Minutes Episode 81

This week we are joined by Emotional Eating Recovery Coach Erin Darling. Erin shares with us her journey with emotional eating and starting her first diet at just 8 years old. She also walks us through her unique strategy for helping women navigate and overcome emotional eating, and shares some helpful coping strategies!

You can find Erin on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/mindsetnutritionstl/

If you have questions, or topics that you want to hear about, head over to our Instagrams https://www.instagram.com/nucrewnutrition/ or https://www.instagram.com/brianna.dietitian/ and send us a DM!

If you are interested in working with us in Metabolism Makeover you can sign up here! https://metabolismmakeover.co/programs/metabolism-makeover/earlybird/?affiliate=mocktailminutes

Featured Mocktails:
The Roasted Purpose - https://www.instagram.com/theroastedpurpose/
Electrolytes Powder Plus - https://www.instagram.com/powdervitamin/

Click play, sip back, and be empowered.

Baylee:

Hello, everyone. Welcome back to this week's episode of Mocktail Minutes. This is Bailey,

Brianna:

And this is Brianna.

Baylee:

today we do have a special guest. We'll have her introduce herself. First, I am drinking, the Roasted Purpose. And I did the, I don't know how to say it, horchata, horchata latte. Yeah,

Brianna:

would say that it's pronounced, I'm not, I'm not going to try it, but yes.

Baylee:

we'll say horchata. And it is really good. It tastes like, well, the smell of it is like the cinnamon roll icing. So it kind of reminds me of a cinnamon roll. But we'll put the discount link for you because you're going to want to try it

Brianna:

Yeah, I know there's lots of new stuff that I want to try on there. I'm just doing the electrolytes powder plus, and I'm doing the Kiwi strawberry Kiwi flavor. So I'm trying to go through all the flavors for you guys. Cause I'm such a creature habit. And I'm just like, do the mango and everyone's like, there's like 50 flavors. I'm like, I don't know. But so far this is the fourth flavor I've tried. They're all very good. This is a more calm taste, I guess. It's not so.

Baylee:

strawberry kiwi is another one that it's like hit or miss on if it's good or not

Brianna:

It's good. Take it with a grain of salt, guys, but it's good.

Baylee:

All right And then like I said, we do have a guest today and erin Would you like to introduce yourself tell us a little bit about your background what you do? And then we'll kind of jump into everything.

Erin:

Okay, great. Well, thanks ladies for having me. My name is Erin Darling and my business is Mindset Nutrition. I focus on the emotional side of eating and I tell people, you know, it's not necessarily about The weight, but more the weight what's going on up here. I have a master's in nutrition and master's in education. I'm a former teacher. So I marry the two together and feel like I am able to provide something that's unique because of my education background. And I have a certification in eating disorder, intuitive therapy. So I really focus on that disordered. part of eating. Most of my clients are more bingers than restrictors, but I have had some restrictors and I have personal experience myself with growing up with disordered eating. I put myself on my first diet at eight years old. And then really had a negative relationship with food till I was about 25 and newly married and I thought, I have got to figure this out. I have to do something different. I just knew I was going to have daughters and I do. And I thought I am just going to pass all of this on to them. So that started just this whole journey of changing the way I think, changing the way I approach food, changing the way I take care of myself. And it's been awesome and that's really what I Teach my clients and I have water with trace minerals today

Baylee:

Yes. Hey water is important, too

Erin:

Yeah, yeah,

Brianna:

taste them, the trace minerals, when you just put it with water? How do you like the

Erin:

you can that's a great question. I tell clients so on the bottle it'll say like 20 drops I say like if you do 20 drops, it's gonna taste like metal, you know And so I I kind of space it out throughout the day like five to six drops I also find that People that have really sensitive stomachs, it will cause a bathroom emergency because of the magnesium. So I just, like, just play it safe. So,

Brianna:

That's so smart. I've never, that's, what a concept.

Erin:

I sneak them in my kids waters, you know, but I have to keep it pretty, like, five drops. Otherwise, they're like, did you put those drops in my water? I'm like, I don't know what you're talking about.

Brianna:

That's weird. Stop it. You're being weird.

Erin:

I know. No, I mean, my kids know I'm weird already. They don't, I don't have to hide it. They know about all my weird stuff and weird food and

Brianna:

I love it.

Baylee:

it's fine. That's, the day's gonna come for me too, and Gannon's gonna be like, Mom, you're freaking weird, and all my other friends are eating these foods, and why have I never even heard of them? I don't

Erin:

oh yeah. Oh yeah. But you, you'll be amazed like the neighbor kids come over and they love. Our stuff like they love our gluten free pretzels and they I mean they they just it's different And so they're always really interested in what's going on and I am like take it because if it's exposing them to different things I think it's great, you know, so They'll like your stuff

Baylee:

Yes. Yeah. And we're definitely like creatures of habit. So I feel like the more that you do kind of like have it around, then they're going to start to try and like, Oh, it's actually pretty good. And it's so hard in our world because I feel like everyone just has a negative connotation where it's like the saying of, if it tastes good, it's not good for you. I'm like,

Brianna:

Yeah.

Baylee:

it's a really annoying thing.

Erin:

It is frustrating. Yeah, it is and I think that's just people that have yeah just existed in The the habit world and eating the same thing over and over again. So

Baylee:

Yes. And you mentioned you started your, you were like on your first diet at eight years old. How did that, like, what was the diet? How did it affect you growing up? Tell me

Erin:

Yeah. So I mean, it's interesting because I, I am very self aware and I love to overanalyze myself and think back. And I don't really know when this shift started, but I do know sometime before eight years old, I really relied on food as a coping mechanism. I have ADHD. I didn't get diagnosed as an adult, but I can look back and see that I was really looking for that dopamine hit over and over. And so I was really compulsive with food. So what I do remember about eight years old was I was at a Girl Scout meeting, the little Debbie's came out and I passed it up. And I just remember starting to try and cut back on those foods. Treats. I really didn't understand what I was doing until I was about an eighth grade right before high school, and then I dropped a ton of weight, and then that kind of started that. Like, well, if this, if being this small is great, then being smaller is even better. Or if eating a thousand calories is great, then 800 is better, you know, and I existed in that even throughout college. So it started with this overeating, you know, just this back, like over, under, really just negative relationship with my body and food.

Baylee:

Absolutely, and I can definitely relate to that. I've always been a smaller person. Like, growing up, I was always under the 10th percentile. So, I've always been pretty petite. And, you know, as I got older, I would get a lot of comments of like, how small I was, and like, you're always the smallest person. So then, In my head, I was like, okay, I have to be the smallest person. And so that was like really big pressure on me where I really didn't even recognize until really I became a dietitian and I started working with others. I was like, hmm, that probably was not the healthiest mindset that I had going on of being like, how small can I get? How can I stay this small so everyone thinks it's like a great thing? But yeah, I can definitely get into that.

Erin:

you probably hear I mean you guys can both relate like you hear things from people you're working with and you're it'll like click something in your brain and you think, Oh my gosh I've done that or I do that or that's the thought I've had or belief and so I think we can learn so much from the people we work with to like,

Brianna:

Yeah.

Erin:

I feel so fortunate for that.

Brianna:

It's like, there was like a light bulb moment for me about maybe like a year and a half ago. And I was working with a client and I didn't even realize like, wait, I've had this like thought too. It was like the idea that we're under so much pressure trying to be this person that we like identify with, like, it's part of our identity. Like when I was a lot younger and when I had gotten married, I was very, very small. not in a healthy way, but it was like something that was like, this is my identity. I'm like the thin girl. I'm the five, two, very thin. This is how I look. And when I started to get a little bit older, gain a necessary weight, have babies, I was still thin, but I wasn't like that thin, thin where everyone was commenting on it. And it was like, In my head that was like, I need to get back to me. I want to feel like me, my identity. And I went to the client and she was like, I just want to feel like me again. And I was like, well, who, what does that feel like? And it was like this weird expectation she had of like 25, 30 years ago. And I was like, well, how long has it been since you've been her? And she's like, I don't know. I'm like, we need to think about who we want to be. Like, how do we want to fit of this? Like, cause usually those expectations we have are, they don't feel great. Like we're not, You know, it's a weird pressure. Yeah. It was such a moment. I was like

Erin:

Yeah. I hear that a lot, too, from people. For

Baylee:

And even being like postpartum right now, so I had ganon 15 weeks ago and Still like not fitting in my jeans and I was going through I was like what the heck everyone said I'm gonna bounce back and And so it was a lot. It was like pressure from there, but then honestly, I just came to the realization I'm like, you know, I've been the same size jean since I was in high school It makes sense that I'm probably not going to be back to that size, but I mean, I just had a baby or hips widen when you have a baby. So I'm like, logically, like, it's okay to go up a gene size and that's like a normal adult woman size. And so that was honestly like something I recently just struggled with because I was so focused on, yeah, just like getting back to the me before a baby. And I'm like, I mean, things are just different now and that's okay. But yeah,

Erin:

Yeah. Is it your second?

Baylee:

it's, he's my first one

Erin:

Oh, okay. You're first. Oh yeah. Yeah. Your body changes. I mean, my feet went up like a whole size and a half and, and, but then eventually they went back down, which was so crazy. So, I mean, it took a bit, but eventually they went back to the way they were. So, I mean, it's like everything, all those ligaments. stretch out. And so it's hard. There's so much pressure we put on ourselves and your body. I laughed because I, I was never that person. I, you know, breastfeeding is just going to, it's going to fly off of you. And no, no,

Brianna:

me neither. I was, I was never, it was, yeah, no. And that is hard. It's just, I think you, and you probably deal with this a lot in your practice, like letting people know, like, it's okay that our bodies change and trying to balance like, okay, like let's work on the, like you said, the way up here first.

Erin:

Yep.

Baylee:

yeah, you said you worked with more restrictors I mean with more bingers versus restrictors So, can you clarify for everyone just in case people don't know like how can you tell if you are more of a restrictor? Or if you're more kind of on the binge side of things or how can you tell like am I? Emotional eating because I think that can be a little bit hard for people to

Erin:

Yeah. So a binger, and that's what I struggle with most in my life is more of an escape. I think of it more of as an, as an escape. So you're maybe overly full after a binge. And then, you know, the purge is part of like, if there's a purge involved, then that's the escape. The binge starts the escape. Like, wherever I'm at right now. Now in this moment, I don't want to be here and I want to escape my body. And then if you land in that really full moment and you. or wanting to purge, purging can show up in lots of ways, not just the traditional, you know, making yourself vomit, but over exercising, you know, I, I just ate, now I have to go to the gym or laxatives, detox, pills, shakes, things like that. So it's more of this escape, whereas restricting is really about control. And I've seen that pop up you know, even just COVID, I, COVID has triggered, you know, a couple of years ago triggered some people where they felt like their whole life was out of control, but the food was one thing that they could control. And so it's more of that under eating, obviously really meticulous about every bit that you're eating versus, you know, overeating as an escape and to assess if someone's emotionally eating. So we all do it. I mean, you know, it's constant for a lot of people, or at least it comes up and it's really eating anytime in response to an emotion when you're, when you're not hungry. And I always tell people, if you find yourself negotiating, so like you're, You know, going to pop some popcorn, but you're negotiating with yourself about it. Like, should I pop this? Should I not? I don't know. Am I hungry? Am I not? Well, I had a great day or I've been good or this, that, or the other. That's an emotional response. If you made your beautiful breakfast of eggs and Dave's killer bread and avocado and berries or something like that, you, you wouldn't negotiate it. Like you would just eat it. You know, but when you feel like you are eating out of, out of emotion, there tends to be a little inner turmoil negotiation conversation in your head. And I think often we don't even notice it, you know, so that's how I, I tell them if you, and they'll tell me, you know, they'll tell me the whole process of negotiation too. So that's a really good sign that it's an emotional moment.

Baylee:

And I feel like with, well, with a lot of my clients, I, part of it, obviously the mindset, but like putting all food on an even playing field is kind of what I help them work through because like you mentioned, like, we don't really, like if we eat eggs, We are not having this like internal argument with ourself about oh my gosh, should I eat them? Should I not like we just eat up and it's and it's fine. But like if we eat a pizza, it's like oh my gosh I've been bad. I gotta go work out and it's like all these different emotions come up where it's like other foods We don't so then I think sometimes if we just put pizza and like cookies or whatever it is on the same playing field It's like It takes out that emotional toll because then we don't feel so guilty and we don't just fall into this trap of like, Oh, I've been bad. Kind of like that effort mentality. And

Erin:

Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right, right, and we talk about that, you know, food, I hear that all the time, I was bad or I ate bad or I ate good, and I say, you know, food is neutral, you know, it has no morality. But did you feel bad? Like, like physically, did you have reflux? Did you have stomach pain? You know, let's focus on that. Like, how do you feel? Did you feel like you needed to take a nap? Did you have energy? Were you, was your blood sugar balanced for five hours? You know, those are the things to really focus on versus like good or bad, you know? And also like, I really encourage them, like if they say, I had McDonald's, then the justifications will come in, right? Like, well, I had a coupon and I was busy and I was in the area and dah, dah, dah. And I really work on pushing them to say, I had McDonald's because I wanted to. Right. Taking, yeah, taking ownership. I said, because if you can take ownership of those moments, then you can also take ownership of the moments that go really well too, right? It's. It's, it's because we're, we're so used to that diet world where we have no choice of our own. And we want somebody to tell us what to do, when to eat it, how to eat it, how much, what time. And so we, struggle if we're not getting those rules. And then if we go outside of it, we want to have a justification as opposed to like, that's what I wanted to do. And then I wanted to do this, like, like own your own choices. Know that you're in charge. I'm not in charge, really. I'm just guiding.

Baylee:

yes,

Brianna:

that empowerment really does help people because it is like when I'm working with clients, I find they're looking for that validation. Like, tell me this is okay. Was this a good choice? Is this all right? And I'm always like kind of putting it back on them. Like, Well, you tell me why, like, do you think this was a good choice? And if it's yes. Okay. Why? Like, cause it kept me full. Cause it, whatever, you know, if no, why? Because it didn't, it didn't keep me full. I had cravings later, like, et cetera. And so I think just being like, yeah, I ran through McDonald's cause that's what I wanted to do today is just like almost a relief of like, okay, cause there's a lot of shit around food choices.

Erin:

Yeah, there is. I do some corporate trainings and I was in the middle of a training and someone stopped me and said, what do you think about the pimento and an olive? I mean, like down to the smallest details and I'm, I said, what do you think about a pimento and an olive? You know, like it's, we get so worried about the fight, like these tiny details when, you know, well, do you like olives? Do they feel good in your body? You know, and, and. So, it's just, yes, they want that validation, I think that's a great point, and they want to know that they're doing a good job and that they're doing it right, but really teaching them that it's really your own inner validation, your own self coaching that you need to rely on and comes from being aware and being open and honest with what you're eating and your choices.

Baylee:

absolutely. I like how you talk about, yeah, like taking that ownership because I kind of say the similar thing to my clients, like to be a hundred percent honest I care but I also I don't care what you choose to do outside here and i'm like I mean the most loving way because I can tell you all the information in the world. I can give you all this information I can write you meal plans. I can make you a checklist. I can do all these things But at the end of the day, I need you to want it just as much as I want it for you So you have to care about making these choices for yourself and not making them for me Like i'm glad you put me on this pedestal or whatever But At the end of the day, eventually you're going to knock me off my pedestal and you're going to be like, Okay, I need to count on myself.

Erin:

Exactly. I think if they, if they want to do it, like if they say, do you think I should stop drinking my soda? I'll say, do you want to stop drinking your soda? Because if you don't want to, me telling you to is not really gonna last. You have to want to do that because if you don't and you try not to and you're avoiding it and then you have this day where the stars align and you just gotta get your Diet Coke, then that's what you'll do. it's up to you. I, I love that. You know, I care, but I don't care. You know, we do, but we want them to care the most, you know?

Brianna:

Great. Like what are you doing outside of here for the majority of your life? I think that

Baylee:

like this is your body.

Brianna:

Yeah, exactly. And you're in charge. And I think that brings up a good point because I know when Bailey and I are working with clients, we're working a lot on like habit change. A lot of our clients are like, okay, I want to lose weight. And so our number one thing we're trying to do is like, number one, are you eating enough? Because it's hard to lose weight when you're under eating, constantly thinking about food. And I find for most women, they're like, I have bad habits. I emotionally eat at night. I just can't stop and i'm like, okay well step number one Let's make sure we're eating enough because it is very hard to Grasp emotional eating if you're actually hungry number one So and usually I find once they get a better grasp of like normal meal times balanced meals They're feeling better blood sugar balance. They're finding like oh, that's actually not as As, as much of an issue as I thought, but then I still do get other clients who are like, I think I'm still doing emotional eating. And for me, I'm like, well, now let's establish, is this just habitual? Like, is this a habit or do, or is this true? I'm really trying to like cope with something with food. So how do you kind of tell the difference or how do you help clients navigate? Is it habit? Is it

Erin:

Yeah, so I always tell them like in a consultation often there, there are tiers often in a consultation and they'll tell me that they do this eating and. emotional eating. And I, I always tell them to start that the only reason they started doing that in the first place, you know, turning to food to soothe was because they were trying to feel better. They weren't trying to make themselves feel worse. They, they were looking for a coping mechanism and often we learn it in childhood. And maybe our emotions weren't co regulated with our adults because maybe they didn't know how to do it. And so they learn this ha and they learn this coping mechanism and then it does become a habit. And I say you've taught your brain this and your brain loves it. patterns and it loves to repeat things. And so now we have to teach our brain something new. And so it's important. I love, I love making sure that they're eating enough. I always tell them most people eat like in a triangle, you know, they have like nothing, nothing, nothing. And then the wheels fall off and they come home and they're just like, you know, like just eating, eating their face off. I hear stuff like that, you know, because they're so hungry and you're right. Like if you're. Trying to avoid that emotional moment. Like. When you're an emotional eater, you don't really need a lot of reasons to eat. Like it could be raining. You could have spilled your coffee. Like, and, and then if you're hungry, forget it. Like

Brianna:

everything out the window? Of course you're going to eat. Yeah.

Erin:

Right. So I think it's really important to recognize where are those moments in the day where it's happening? Like, where is it? Is it nighttime? Is it on your way home from work? I've heard that, you know, I need to stop at quick trip and get myself a A prize for completing my work day. You know, where are the moments, you know, so that you can catch them. I call it, call it catching the cue. You know, where, where are you being cued in your day? And then the first thing I teach them at like a very high level before we start going deep into childhood wounds is just set a timer. So you have that urge. Like, let's say for me, when my kids were little and my husband was doing tons of travel. It was nighttime, you know, I'm like, okay, I survived the day. Everybody's alive. You know, I didn't scream at anyone today. And so I would go down and like, where are the chocolate chips? You know? And so that was the moment. And so that urge in that moment feels. urgent, right? So I teach them, set a timer, 10 minutes on your phone, your microwave, wherever. And for that 10 minutes, you are just not acting on that urge. You're building that mental muscle and you're, you're trying to create space between urge and action. Cause often we like feel it. You know, and then we act on it. So we're just trying to teach our brain that we can pause. You know, I have all these little things. There's power in the pause, pausing, setting yourself up, calming and, you know, urges are like clouds in the sky. Like they just, they don't last. They're very primitive, you know? So oftentimes that is a really good starting off point for people. And I say in that 10 minutes, I don't care what you do. You are not done. Acting on the urge. Repeat after me, you know, just to just push them a little bit so that they can know like, okay, and I said if the timer goes off and you still really want it, then have it, but know that you made it 10 minutes longer than normal and shoot for 11 the next time and 12 and just keep building it up because there will be a day when it's gone. Your brain will move on,

Brianna:

And then it kind of felt like I decided like the timer went off. Do I want it? And then you're making a choice other than like that urgent like knee jerk. I'm just in the

Erin:

right? Like a real choice, not in response to that emotion. You're not stuck in that moment. So, I mean, so I think it's, it's a combination of, it's emotional, but it's also a habit. You know?

Baylee:

And we react really quickly on emotions, like even thinking about it outside of food. Think about like, if you've ever been in an argument with someone and you fire back something and then a little bit later, you're like, Oh, Maybe I should not have said that or it can also go the other way like man if I would have said this it would Have just helped my situation because we had time to process and not just fire back based on emotion.

Erin:

Absolutely. I think that's just learning to have that pause is great in all areas. I say like, it's hard to wait. It's hard for kids to wait. It's hard for adults to wait, but it's powerful. Like learning to just pause, not react, breathe for a minute is really helpful across the board.

Baylee:

and You teach based on like what you're balancing, correct?

Erin:

Yeah, so I do, we always start with that. I tell them how to build a plate, you know, focusing on protein and making sure that they have enough protein at each meal so that their blood sugar is balanced throughout the day because that's critical. Just like we said, they, they have to be able to be full and satisfied so that they're not this sugar burner, always running. To grab another bag of chips or a granola bar or something like that. Because that can create an emotional response. So yes, we start, we start there. And then we build upon that with habits, different habits.

Baylee:

Yes, cuz

Erin:

emotional piece is there always it's always

Baylee:

yes Yeah, it's important to kind of have those meals down first. I think

Erin:

Mm hmm.

Baylee:

Before kind of like diving into okay here Okay, this is how we're gonna stop the late night binge because yeah If we're not eating blood sugar balancing meals, then of course, it's gonna cause us to have more cravings Do you want to I mean we've kind of touched on that a little bit because we also teach based on blood sugar balancing meals Which I think is pretty almost in our world of dietetics. A lot of people that I see, they're like, Oh yeah, like this is interesting. You're not going to show me my plate. I'm like, no, I don't teach off my plate.

Erin:

Yeah,

Baylee:

so I think it is very new to people. Do you want to explain a little bit further about how doing these blood sugar balancing meals can affect like those cravings?

Erin:

yeah, absolutely I think that I mean, I know personally struggling with eating throughout my life when I was a young teacher I taught art which is so different than what I do now, but I was on that blood sugar rollercoaster you know, like let me have my sugary oatmeal with no protein and then I'd have a Granola bar. I mean, and I was just constantly riding this roller coaster, like up and then crashing. And as an emotional eater, my entire life, you know, like that crashing feeling is so connected to feeling bad, you know, emotional eating is. Is an escape. It's a state changer. So we turn to it if our if we're feeling bad, if we're feeling sluggish, tired, or blood sugar has crashed. And so by having so as that teacher, I remember one day I'm like 25 and I made eggs for breakfast and I thought I had invented the coolest thing because I just taught all morning and I was fine. And I thought, Oh, my gosh, wow. Like I didn't have this drop in my blood sugar. It was just, So eye opening to me because I was never taught that. And so I was able to just keep going, keep teaching. I didn't have to stop. I didn't, I didn't plummet. And that, I think that plummet feeling is just so connected to the emotional response. If you're full and you're satisfied and you're not hungry, you're not going to think about it. You're less likely to think about it. You know, turn, you know, you turn on that satiety signal and you can just keep going as opposed to getting that drop and getting that signal constantly that you're hungry. Then you're going to go grab something out of emotion because you're experiencing something in that moment as well. Maybe you're stressed at work or overwhelmed or whatever. It's all going to kind of highlight it in that moment. Yeah.

Brianna:

think it's the easier way to deal with it,

Erin:

Yeah.

Brianna:

you know,

Erin:

going and getting the food.

Brianna:

no, just like trying to go have like blood sugar balance and not be

Erin:

Oh yeah. Yeah.

Brianna:

as opposed to like, just fight through the hunger. Cause I've had so many, so many like clients I'm like, okay, well, what do you do when you're like, Yeah. You know, really in that battle of like, should I snack? Should I not show a section out there? Like, you know, and it's the age old diet tricks. Like I chug water or I go brush my teeth or I just go to bed or like, you know, or I let myself sit with it. Cause some personal trainer was like, it's good to be hungry. And I'm like, I feel like you're making it so amplified. Like now it's like this, that stack food, whatever it is, is like. It's just so like, oh, on this pedestal now, you're not gonna stop thinking about it when I'm like, that's the hard way to do it. I don't know if we need to torture ourselves like that.

Erin:

Yeah. I agree. I agree. If you're full and satisfied, if you, you know, end your dinner and it was delicious and it, and you feel like, like if they say, I just had, you know, grilled chicken and steamed broccoli, I'd say, yeah. Well, I would want to eat all evening too, like that sounds terrible. So let's make that a little more exciting, you know, like let's put a little fat on our broccoli and let's marinate our chicken or, you know, like let's make it a little bit more exciting and then you're not going, you're going to be less likely to want to have something in the evening. Yes. Because if you're just concentrating on that urge, it does feel good. grow. It's like a snow globe. When you shake it, when you're giving it energy, the snow goes everywhere. When you're not, you set it down, everything's calm. You know, easier said than done though

Baylee:

Yeah.

Brianna:

A hundred

Baylee:

And I think you bring up a good point too about sometimes when we get into this dieting world, it can definitely feel boring because it gets to like that broccoli, chicken and rice type thinking like you can absolutely eat more than broccoli, chicken and rice and still lose weight, still build muscle like food can still be fun. So I think part of what I like about when we're teaching through Metabolist Makeover is that we give a meal plan, I actually create the meal plans, but we Don't require people to follow the meal plan and honestly, I tell people like don't even follow it as a meal plan use it as a recipe book

Erin:

Yeah. Yeah.

Baylee:

yeah, like it just helps people to see it doesn't have to be this boring chicken and broccoli meal because like you said, yeah, you are going to be hungry. You have like no fat there. So that makes sense. Fat kind of helps you stay fuller for longer kind of elongates that blood sugar curve a little bit. So we need to have all those components there.

Brianna:

And it's tasty.

Baylee:

Yeah, and it tastes good.

Brianna:

ta.

Erin:

It's good. Yeah, and I say like when you're trying to cut back on some of those foods that Spike more blood sugar, you know, then if you're you're getting rid of things, you know Add something back in like if you're out to dinner and you're not gonna eat the bun on your burger We'll ask them to put a fried egg on top, you know Or a slice of avocado like you don't have to just have this burger plain on your plate with a pickle on top You know You can Ask her a couple more things and make it a little more exciting so that you're having more and you're, you're, it's such a mental mind game to not feel that deprivation, you know, but we just need to give ourselves permission to not take everything away, but add some things back in as well.

Baylee:

Kind of thinking about that like deprivation side of things where again I feel like so we do work with a lot of weight loss clients And I think a lot of times coming into it Some people can be just like it's that automatic thinking of oh, this is restrictive. I can't have a bun and my fries How or like what is your advice there when going from? Working to balance your blood sugar more versus like not being so in that restrictive type mindset Does that make sense Trying to figure out how the best way to say that

Erin:

Like how, like how did you both like how to, how to be able to do both, you know,

Baylee:

so basically how to adjust your meals and Make sure they're more blood sugar balancing So it's probably going to be a change than what you're doing because if you're seeing one of us There's probably some things, you know, you need to change but also not to feel so restrictive

Erin:

Right. Exactly. Yeah. I, I think it's important to focus on what is important on your plate first. You know, I always tell them if you, if you have nothing else, but the only thing that you can have is a little bit of protein and fat because that's all you have in your fridge, you know, that's. Great. And then build around it. You know, you can add those complex carbs if you want them. I always say like, if you're craving them, cause maybe hormonally you're really craving sweet potatoes or rice or lentils, have them, have them be a smaller part of your plate or like mix them in or think of them, you know, just as like an added component. But if you also don't really, you're not really craving them, you don't necessarily have to have them on your plate, but listen to your body and, and how, you know, what your hormones are saying to you and, and how you're feeling and have them if you need them, but again, I teach, let's keep it a smaller component and focus on the protein and the non starchy veggies and then have it. But I also teach, you know, having moments in your week. that are planned exceptions. Like you're having an exception to what you normally do. So maybe you don't normally go out and have, chips and salsa and queso and margaritas and whatever, but you're going to go do that on Saturday night, you know, like have a couple of those two to three moments in your week where you allow yourself to have those things, because it's really important to teach your brain. You know, often we, like you said, the F it thing, we feel like we've made a mistake. And so we quit, it's like tripping down a couple of stairs and throwing yourself down the whole flight, you know? And so you also have to practice the art of having that Mexican dinner. And then also the next day waking up making your egg smoothie, whatever you would normally have that feels good. Like being able to come back is really important too.

Baylee:

And I would say too, some of it, it kind of depends on where our client or the patient is in their journey because if you are someone who you're coming into this automatically feeling restricted, then that's where I'm like, okay, let's just focus on getting protein and getting some vegetables and then if you want, yeah, if you want the potato, add the potato. And I think a lot of people start to realize, oh, I've been pretty low on protein. I've been pretty low on fiber. That's why I want cereal all day long or whatever it is. And so that's a good realization. Oh, I was missing out on this part. This is why I was wanting this all the time. And honestly, that's what I recognized for myself, because I really didn't realize how off my blood sugar was until I started like going through the Metabolism Makeover Coaching Program. But also when I started interning at the hospital, I was like, Oh, I cannot make it through rounds without feeling hungry again. Like I could not see all my patients without feeling hungry again. I was like, Oh, this, this doesn't seem right. I need to switch something up. I was on one protein and very low on vegetables.

Erin:

Yeah. That's a great point. Yeah. And I think a lot of people exist in that world too. So. I'm teaching them how to eat real meals instead of this like picking all day or not eating all day, handful of this, six almonds, you know, let's stop and eat real meals. And in the beginning, I'm not, I, I'm like, I don't even care what's in your meal as long as there's protein. And then we'll start kind of adjusting your meals as we go as your confidence builds and you feel like, okay, I'm actually sitting down and eating, but I, but we want to kind of. Tweet the meals a little bit. So it's in phases for sure. And yes, everybody is in a different spot. Most of the people I work with though, like they're professionals, like they've been doing this They, they know, they know what to do. They are, they, it is, it's like a hobby at this point. And when I teach them how to build, you know, this blood sugar balancing plate and they just kind of steadily start releasing weight, it's like they, like they're waiting for the catch, you know, they're like, Really? Like this is so simple and like, it really is simple. We just make it so much more complicated and there's a, there's kind of a feeling of loss there because they're so used to researching their next diet and they love that, like the hunt and then the excitement of it and the novelty of the new thing. And then it's like, no, you don't, you don't have to, but. On the flip side, when they get really good at those meals and they feel like this is an area of their life, they don't have to fixate on or focus on, like so many other things happen, like their career takes off or they're, they're like, I organized my whole house or, you know, like they have brain and like, like space in their brain and energy to do other things that are actually more important than obsessing about. Diets, you know,

Baylee:

Yeah. We joke all the time how people quit their jobs when they start working with us.

Erin:

I do that. Yeah, I have that too. Jobs, spouses.

Brianna:

Yeah.

Baylee:

I've had yeah Yeah, sorry everybody, but when your mind is clear you're like, okay, I want my life to be better in all these areas I think i've had four people Quit or change their jobs since april.

Erin:

Wow.

Brianna:

Or when they start to feel good, like they realize like, wow, I can actually feel good. I don't have to be in this like turmoil. It's like, well, how else can I feel good?

Erin:

exactly. Yeah.

Brianna:

had someone the other day and they were, cause I was asking you about stress and it was a new, it was a new client and it was outpatient. And so. It's different, right? You're, you're personal and then outpatient, but the buy in and he was like, yeah, you know, my stress is like out of six or seven. I can't really change that. Like that's just my job. I'm not going to be able to get away from that. And like, in my mind, I'm like, Oh,

Baylee:

You wait for it

Brianna:

It's like that's yeah, but I just think people are an autopilot and it's the same about food. Like I'm just used to always struggling. I I'm a person who struggles with my weight. I struggle with emotional eating. I struggle with this. This is who I am. And so it's hard because it's conflicting with where they want to be. And so they're always just like identifying as that person. And I do have a question because We've talked about a couple of things that all kind of interplay. So like I've had, I've had a couple of clients where it's like, okay, I'm eating for blood sugar balance. I'm starting to see it. I really feel good. I'm trusting the process. I'm loving it. I'm doing less emotional eating. And it was someone that maybe like would have considered themselves. Like I kind of binge eat, even though there was no like purge. So it's not technically binge eating, but you know, just feeling like I really just emotional eat. And they are trying to navigate, okay, I haven't emotional aid at all since I've been focusing, focusing on this, but now I need to figure out like, how do I go have ice cream with my child after school and not just go off the rails? Like, how do I trust myself? And so, and you know, I walk them through the best way I know how, but since this is like your, how would you tell them like, Hey, let's try navigating it like this,

Erin:

Yeah, well, first of all, I love that example ice cream with your child, and I teach them that concept of making those moments like, like an experience, as opposed to like, I'm eating it out of the freezer, or I had a client that would hide in her pantry and eat because Because binge eating is always a super private thing. We don't really do it in front of people. We feel shame around it. And so, I think it just goes back to that planned exception. But also, there are moments that, You're not going to plan. And I remember experiencing that with my younger daughter when she was pretty little, and we were going to go get ice cream. And I said, Hey, I'm not going to get it today. And I said it to the back seat. And then she said, well, then I don't want to get it because it's not fun getting it by myself. And I thought, okay, Aaron, get the ice cream with her, you know, so. We can plan for everything, but sometimes that doesn't happen and we have these moments. And so having, you know, a portion that feels like you know, not the biggest portion because you know that you're going to have ice cream again, ice cream is not going away, you know, teaching your brain that, okay, I'm just going to get a smaller size. I'm going to get the flavor I want and the toppings I want. But I can also have this again if I want to. I think telling ourselves we can't have it, you know, obviously makes us want it more. And, and just enjoying the experience. And then I love how you said trusting yourself, trusting yourself to know that I'm not going to feel guilty. I'm not going to feel bad. I'm going to enjoy it. And then I'm going to come back to center is what I usually call it. Not like get back on track. I don't love that. So, and I think if you're existing in a world where you're feeding yourself well, most days, and you feel really great, like an ice cream moment is not going to be Big deal. And when they come in and we talk about wins, we always talk about wins first. Like that would be a win. I would say that's a win. Like you had ice cream and it didn't take you out. You know, I mean, we don't need to be so all or nothing with food, food and exercise are the only things we do that with, you know, we're not like, you know, what, I'm not going to be your mom today or anymore because you made me mad yesterday or we didn't have a good day, but we have a little ice cream or we miss our morning workout and then we're like. Well, then I'm not going to work out today, you know or I'm going to just eat I'm just going to eat my face off because I had this ice cream, you know, but every choice is, is independent of one another. So I really celebrate it. I try to just celebrate it a ton so that they know like, okay, great. and not have it in your house. I mean, don't set yourself up for failure, like, like go and have it, but. Don't, it's not, it's not the same if it's just this quick thing you're doing at home because you are sad and stressed and you need a release, so. Hopefully that's

Baylee:

Yeah, I think that's honestly like a good spot to end this on is just Right there. I think that was a good kind of like last message kind of being more intentional with it all and not just Standing in your pantry eating chocolate chips pouring them right out of the bag If you want some chocolate chips put them in a little bowl, whatever you need to do

Erin:

yeah, like, like, be present with it. Like, make it a real, like a real choice. Like you're owning this choice. Like going back to the McDonald's, like I had that and I, I'm, I'm present. I'm enjoying it. I'm aware of it. And then I'm moving on, you know, and not shaming yourself for it.

Baylee:

Like not feeling like you have to sneak it like you're not having to sneak food out of the pantry and everything just be more intentional and don't Have that feeling of oh my gosh if someone catches me like this is gonna be really bad type of thing Like I have some people where they have been like they some of them do log their foods I don't require anyone to log all the time But some of them do and they're like well I won't put it in if I had some ice cream because you'll see it then I had ice cream last week, too And it's fine

Brianna:

I'd rather know

Baylee:

me know

Erin:

put it in.

Brianna:

I'd rather know what you're doing. So it's like, Hey, let's, let's, yeah, let's make a plan for it. Let's make sure you feel good about it. If you're not putting it in like red flag, you feel bad about it. You feel bad. I'm like, why do you feel bad? I'm more interested in why you feel bad. I'm also more interested in the stuff you're avoiding. Like that's, that's what I'm really interested in.

Erin:

Right. And it goes back to if you are not going to take ownership of that moment, then you're kind of blind to the moments that felt good to, you know, it's like, I have no, you know, I'm a victim of my circumstances. I have no control over what I'm eating when we actually have complete control, you know, and the hiding and the sneaking, like all of that is. Deep, like it goes back to, to childhood. I mean, there are so many

Baylee:

it really does,

Erin:

people say, and I know exactly, I can say, did you have a home like this? And they're like, yeah,

Baylee:

like how do you know? Mm

Erin:

so connected over years now of hearing people and their relationship with food there, it is always connected back to when they were young. And when I kind of highlight that there's. So much healing. I can share just one tiny quick story that I had a client. Wonderful, just amazing client. And. She said, I, I crave ice cream in the evening. I, I have tried everything. I have tried not having it. I'll door dash it. She said, I've tried having as much as I want. I've tried eating it with, you know, just, just, you know, all the different tricks, you know, allowing herself and everything. But a few minutes before that she had told me that her dad was often not around. So I said, was ice cream something that you ate with your dad? And she said, me. It was, I said, would you eat it in the evening? She said, yes. And I said, I think you need to call your dad because he lived in a different state. And she said, I do. And she never had it after that moment. Once she made that connection that she was just doing it to soothe kind of this nostalgic eating. You know, feeling she had inside and she just, if she felt it, she just needed to call him as like a dad's girl. That was it. Like that was the click moment of like, Oh, this is why I'm doing it. And I think when we can figure out why it's so much easier to figure out then, okay, why I'm doing this and then how to change it, because we know why. So that, that was a really fun moment.

Baylee:

yes, you mentioned how, like, you've had a few people cry and get emotional

Erin:

Oh, Oh, everybody.

Baylee:

Yeah, I would say, yeah, like, pretty much everybody, and Every time it happens to someone for the first time in my office, like, I am so sorry. Like, this is so embarrassing. I'm like, literally, I make everyone cry.

Brianna:

Like, you know, it's emotional. I

Erin:

is emotional.

Brianna:

Yeah.

Baylee:

lots of pieces come up that we don't realize. And it's because we are so used to this mentality of just calories, calories, calories that We are just getting so disconnected between our bodies and we don't always recognize those small connections. And when you have this outside perspective from a food professional, basically, then it's like, Oh, okay. That's where that's coming from. It's coming from, I started going to, I have someone, she's like, I started fat camp at 10 years old. And

Erin:

Oh yeah.

Baylee:

that I've been fat all my life. I'm like, well, this is why you feel like you're not worthy of eating a piece of broccoli. Because you're like, who cares?

Brianna:

hmm. Or this is why you hate moving your body so much because you've been shamed into doing it from such a huge like, there's all

Erin:

exercise is a punishment when you were a kid, like I've heard that before, you know, like wall sits when you got in trouble, you know, and so it's so it's and when they cry and say sorry, I always say like, don't be sorry, like, let's get it out. I think as

Baylee:

talk about this.

Erin:

we feel like we have to hide all those feelings or we can't be mad or sad or anything and I'm, I say like, let's not, let's not push it down. Let's let it out. So that we can move through it and release this moment, you know, and so it's really healing, but yeah, it's all so deep. It's all emotional. Such

Baylee:

Yeah. And that's why I tell people too, I'm like, there's a reason why I have tissues right next to me. It's not because my nose is always running. So it

Erin:

Right. I see two boxes behind

Baylee:

I know. I was like, I can see your tissues in your office.

Erin:

everywhere. They're everywhere.

Baylee:

Yes. So it's completely normal to have that emotional reaction once we actually start diving into the nitty gritty. Once we are like kind of past like protein and everything. I think it comes to a point where eventually like, okay, we can see there is something much deeper going on than not being able to plan your meals or whatever. There is something that is blocking you

Erin:

right.

Baylee:

making this change. And then it's like, okay, there it is. And I always think it's like the week three or four

Erin:

Mm hmm.

Baylee:

people, it's something about week three that all of a sudden, all of a sudden something just clicks. It's like, Okay, this is something we need to dive into. I don't know what it is about week three.

Erin:

I think the novelty kind of wears off, you know And they come in and there's like a big deep breath or you know Like you can see something popping up then, you know, the emotion is right there on the forefront And so it's it's time to dig into what's going on, you know now you're not as excited about working with me so let's Let's dig into what's coming up for you today. You know, and sometimes it's anger. I always say like being healthy is like the stages of grief, you know, like there's like bartering, you know, negotiating disbelief, anger. And then there's an acceptance, like there's an acceptance of, okay, if I want to feel really amazing in my body and live a long life and be able to have energy, then this is like, this is the prescription, you know, this is what I need to do. But yes, week three or four, same thing for me,

Baylee:

Yes. Well, I guess I do have one last question that we can end on because of course, as always, we can probably keep talking forever. And we're like, Oh, crap. This is supposed to be Mocktail Minutes. We're not going Mocktail Hours.

Brianna:

Maybe.

Baylee:

so my last question is, we talked about emotional eating, like setting a timer, or I always talk about it, like sitting with your emotions a little bit to see like, what the heck is actually going on? Do you have any advice on how to kind of. redirect your thinking or things to do instead of turning towards food.

Erin:

I think when we go to food, we're like it's an action, right? So sometimes sitting with your feelings is hard for some people because they wanted to get up and go to the vending machine. You know, they wanted to move. And so I tell them, If that's what you wanted to do, you wanted to move, can you go, if you're at work on the first floor, can you go fill up your water on the third floor? I said that recently. And somebody said, yeah. And actually my friend, my teaches works up there and I don't ever see her. So I can say hi to her. Or can you go for a walk or can you have a rage walk, which is what I typically do. I'm going to walk really hard and fast, but I'm going to move through this emotion. You know, or like sometimes it's like, Jumping jacks or running your stairs or I put myself on my treadmill as fast as I possibly can. It's like a Lane change, you know where you're putting like trying to focus on something Like if you're on the treadmill as fast as you can possibly run you have to focus on that You can't focus on this craving anymore, and it sounds crazy But if you're like high energy like me sometimes to go and sit on the treadmill is hard. Some clients really take to journaling and they write out those feelings. Some, I do meditate. I love meditation and I teach that as well in breath work, but sometimes they just need to, they just need to move. Like they have to just move and and don't stand in your kitchen, get out of your kitchen, you know, and move through the motion.

Baylee:

Mm hmm. I like that. Just kind of, yeah, redirecting that energy instead of the energy towards thinking about food, food, food, or that specific thing. Just move. Yeah, I like that.

Erin:

Yeah. Yeah. Move, move it out. I mean, like there's so much with somatics, like shaking your moving it, you know, like, I heard this recently, like, dogs do not hold on to emotions, so after something that kind of startles them or upsets them, like, then they do this, like, whole

Baylee:

Oh, yeah.

Erin:

because they're literally shaking the emotion out, because they're not able to hold on to it. So it's kind of that same idea of shaking, moving, walking as fast as you can, and it's like, it's that 10 minutes thing, and then your brain kind of comes back online, switches lanes back to where you need to be. So,

Baylee:

perfect. Yes. Well, thank you so much for joining us today. It was great getting to talk to you and kind of get to know your practice a little bit more. I think this episode is going to be a great resource for many people.

Erin:

Awesome. Well, thanks so much for having me. It was fun.

Brianna:

Yes. Thank you. Bye.

Baylee:

and we'll be back next week with another topic. Not sure what it is yet, but we will get it together. All right. Goodbye, everyone.

Erin:

Bye

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